Of laziness,facebook and inspiration

Ohkay ladies and gentlemen I am back after a brief hiatus(actually after a long hiatus my last post was written long back but posted much later).All of you who have been wondering what I have been upto all this time lemme tell u pretty much nothing. Those of you who have opened this link expecting something interesting and funny(yeah I am proud of my sense of humour and I don’t give a shit if u don’t think that I am funny) to read ,sorry you will be disappointed.I mean how can you expect something even remotely interesting can happen in my monotonous,drab,extremely boring life.

The only good thing that has happened to me in the past few days is that a few more people have started reading my nonsensical blog.The reason being that I have shamelessly put up the link on my facebook profile.whatever be the reason I would like to thank all my fans err….folks for reading and commenting.

This post sadly wont interest you(hey wait don’t go away keep reading u might end up laughing at my miserable life or even find something interesting by the end).

So as u know I am done with my engineering but I am still waiting for the generous and courageous(daad deni padegi mujhe jo le liya ) companies(TCS and tech Mahindra) to send me my doj.

BTW I got recruited by TCS as well but I wont brag about it here because it seems TCS has been struck with a natural calamity(maybe a draught of employees)Otherwise it would not have taken me.

This never ending wait for my doj has made me frustrated,highly pissed and mostly lazy.Yeah I just snatched the title of the laziest animal on earth from the koala bear.My lazy  bones don’t budge from their place these days.I have become so lazy that I didn’t even make proper use of my free sms pack  and before I knew it expired(my friends who actually know me can realize this is the height of laziness for me).So I don’t text anyone these days not even my best friends.I have become so lazy that I don’t even care to read the forward messages that my friends send me.(No I am not mean and I don’t hate you I am just lazy)

All I do these days is facebooking .My  SMS pack has expired but my gprs pack has not.So I keep checking my facebook account to see what everyone else is upto(yeah u got it rite my life is that boring).I take immense pleasure in commenting on the utterly boring SMs.Ofcourse I do appreciate d amazingly funny ones.I think my friend count decreased,someone removed me and I did not even bother to find out who it was.Anyways I know few people might be getting pissed off with my comments.Just FYI I keep getting notifications of people actually liking my comments and that makes me so happy he he.I have noticed one interesting thing there are a few guys who think they are very funny,may be they actually are but if they find someone making a witty comment they just ignore it or say things like thanks mam for taking my class and all such idiotic things.This actually happened with me a guy put up a stupid question as his SM and when I tried answering it he thanked me for taking his class.So I thanked him in return for putting up that question.Then that a guy went a step ahead and put up a SM in Spanish or French which had the words question and comments in it.Obviously I could know it was meant for me but I did not try out find out what it meant.I don’t give a shit to losers like him who suffer from a syndrome known as the “male ego as big as the blue whale”.Anyways this is not so big a deal coz another guy on orkut had d guts to copy my poem from the about me section on my orkut account and pasted it on his.Even when I repeatedly asked him to delete it he did not.(and u thought I was shameless??)

So now I refrain myself from commenting too much.These days I comment mostly on d SMs of my favourite faces on fb.No they are not my best friends they are my favourite bloggers and all of them(Abhinav Bhatt,Ashwin Kumar and Madhuri iyer) have an awesome sense of humour .

Their joint blog shit for tat is probably the funniest and most sarcastic blog I have ever come across(although I haven’t  come across many blogs still,it is amazingly funny).I love them all for taking me on a laugh riot through their posts.I mean I have actually LOLed,ROFLed and LMAOed readin their posts.While my mum thought I was going insane.

Being d sucker that I am for a good,witty sense of humour  how much I try I cant stop myself from commenting on their SMs.I hope they don’t kick me outta their friendlist.you too can read their blogs http://madhuriaries.blogspot.com and http://peter-blogvibes.blogspot.com                                                                      

Abhinav terminated his previous blog and now blogs anonymously  so I wont give away his link.

Hey I finally gave you something interesting eventhough I know you wont ever return to my poor little blog once you start reading theirs.So this sums up what I have been doing all this while.Taking interest in other persons life and ignoring my own.Maybe I am in desparate need of getting inspired.I have become so lazy that I cant even finish reading a novel.I pick up a book read a few pages get bored and pick another one then the same cycle repeats itself.The only book that I could finish recently was Mitch Albom’s Tuesdays with morrie.It is a highly inspiring book about a dying teacher, how he copes with his illness and teaches the important lessons of life to his favourite student during his last days on earth.Sadly it could do little to inspire my jaded soul.Infact nothing seems to inspire me these days not even the “life is a climb” song by miley cyrus which I keep listening and singing throughout the day(now don’t  sneer all you Eminem.linkin park and pink Floyd fans the lyrics of this song are so awesome).All this emptiness is really irritating.I am so angry and disappointed with myself for whiling away my time.I feel like I am losing my goals and my  dreams(so much so that I feel I should change the name of my blog to ranting monologues).All the notifications for d mba entrance exams are out and I have not even checked out any of those on net.I don’t even feel like taking CAT again.Its been ages since I wrote a full fledged poem.All I do is keep rhyming SMs and comment back in a rhyming tone to a rhyming SM(hey!!!dont u dare call me a loser people like it even abhinav d blogging stalwart liked it manyatimes).See I am so lazy  that I did not even try to think of a nice title and copied it from Tuhin Sinha’s book titled “of love,sex and politics”(hey!!!atleast I am honest ). I am happy now that I am upadating my blog eventhough this post does not make any sense at all.I did not even write what I was actually supposed to.I was going to write about my dearest friends but ended up writing this piece of  shit.(but I will write it soon).Now here is what I am going to do I am making a list of five things that I will try doing during the next few days(no I am not a listomaniac but if this is what it takes for me to come outta my laziness I am going to do it)

1.Write posts more frequently,write sensible poems and not mere rhymes.

2.Write a few short stories or think about the novel that I am going to publish in the future

3.Learn cooking

4.Study (yes,its important even after finishing engg)

5.Read good books and the newspaper with concentration(yeah I don’t even read d newspaper properly these days)

Ok this post is not making any sense but its long maybe I am already recovering from my laziness.yaay!!!!!!!!!!!!

P.S. Anyone who had the guts to read the entire post should feel free to comment.You can also suggest some inspiring books,songs(apart from d ones in my playlist most of those are really inspiring just #FYI),blogs,movies or try inspiring me with your wise words.

Lets see if there is any mai ka laal who can actually inspire me.eel like taking CAT again.ice title and copied it from t rhyming SMtions for d mba entrance exams are out and i e i f life

Life time achievement award

Each and everyone of you who is reading this post kindly flatter me with a deafening applause(arey yaar I am requesting no?atleast I can demand this much from you in lieu of my life Ishtory)

Okay cutting the crap now and coming to the point.My 8th sem results are out.Now I am unwillingly and unknowingly an engineer that too with a lifetime achievement award.Wondering what that is??Hold on don’t you want to know how in the world can a 22 year old girl get a lifetime achievement award?Is she going to die??Well the good news or maybe bad news for some I am very much alive and I have no plans of commiting suicide in the near or for that matter in the distant future as well.It’s a lifetime award because the four f******(who knows I might even be having young readers)years of my engineering college life felt like a lifetime.It felt like it would never end but it did and did with a bang(atleast for me).Ohkaaaaaay finally killing the suspense,the award and the big bang in question is a backlog that has been awarded to me in the subject of embedded system.(yes I know I am a shameless girl).Before anyone of you belonging to the the topper league is reading this post(yes I dream a lot why d hell would a nerdy topper waste his/her precious time on this)stops reading this thinking “OMG a backlog I shouldn’t read this it could be a bad omen for me”.Let me tell you this is my first ever and thankfully the last backlog and apparently there is a system called auto clear in BPUT(dats my university)due to which I can clear the exam without even appearing for the test once again and even after that I will be able to retain a respectable CGPA of 8.1(yay!!!beep you to everyone who have been laughing at my misery all this while).Still a back is a back and I take immense pleasure in accepting my award(back).So in my acceptance speech I would like to thank the following people/things(yes,my shamelessness has reached the heights of mt.everest.)

1.Long live BPUT for failing me only once and creating this wonderful system of auto clear.I promise to unjoin the BPUT sucks community on orkut if everything goes well.

2.Thanks to all those guys who always said until and unless you have at least 1 back you haven’t completed your engineering.

3.I thank my parents for their support and for not expressing their disappointment in me.Sorry mummy,papa for letting you down.

4.I thank my friends(the genuine ones) for showing their concern and also others(fake friends)for their sympathy.

5.I thank the cute Bengali HR from tech Mahindra for selecting me because of him my parents are somewhat less worried because atleast there(useless) daughter has a job.

6.Last but not least I would like to thank d almighty,bhagwan,allah,jesus,rab in short each and every existent form of god for he knows I don’t deserve to pass in the other subjects as well but he showered his kindness on me.Like I said in 1 of my previous post I was basking in the glory of getting a job and forgot to study.(refer to my clueless journey so far…all those newbies,yes am again getting into dream mode)

Applause once again please

Ok all said and done you might think I am a very bindaas,chilled out kinda gal.Well am certainly not taking a chill pill right now.I am worried,depressed,angry etc etc.Well there are many downsides of getting a back.Everytime a friend calls you up to sympathise you have to lighten up and behave as if it is not a big deal.There are others who inspite of knowing that you have a back will crib about how they got E in project,viva etc whereas miss topper topped because she got 0 in all d projects.

To top it all I have two siblings and whenever the results are out immediate comparisons start and this time I am the victim whose self esteem is silently being butchered but I am a strong person now.I have learnt to laugh at myself and look at the brighter side of everything(Mr.Robin Sharma would be happy to read this) although the cluelessness still prevails.

Oh god!!!why why did I decide to do engineering.I know you have better work to do than listening to me but I still hope you would guide and help me to do the right thing at the right time.I know you gave me a job but you know I am not fit for it and I don’t even want it.Please god help me to do that which I can give my heart to I promise to put my best efforts.

What you think it has become too senti now good it better be shed some tears for me .You cant get away so easily laughing at my misery.

A very loud beep you to all those who thought I was a padhaku and always taunted before every exam(even the internals),oh you must have studied everything now don’t lie.Yeah rite i studied and failed and you didn’t study and topped.Poor me…I guess I went ghas charne(graze grass,I see foreign visitors on the globe wala widget)when god was distributing brain to everyone.

See now you know my name is Manisha and I am not a padhaku.I agree I was never good at dancing,drawing,sports,singing,debating and all such extra curricular activities but that does not mean I spent four years locked up in my room and immersed myself under a pile of textbooks.You should have taunted me as a time waster coz that is what I did I wasted for fucking years of my life(yes now I don’t care whosoever reads it bachalogs don’t waste your life like me do what your heart says not what others ask you to do)
p.s. i wrote this long back and now all is well my backlog will get skipped BPUT zindabad

The Clueless journey so far...

Every time i see the about me section in a social networking site i just go completely blank in my mind.I dont know wat to write about myself.So i think the word that best describes me is clueless.Today is one of those days when nothing seems right and everything is out of place.Today i heard the oft-repeated statement by my brother for the umpteenth time,which is "how the hell did u become an engineer" also" you dont even know this and you call yourself an engineer "blah blah blah......for a stupid thing that i did which i dont even want to mention but it cost me 200 bucks and a headache and a legache as well.Now go figure...This conversation made me reflect back on my life and i realised that i have always been like this always confused,always without a clue and i still am.Whether its about the choice of study,career,relationships i just dont seem to have a clue and just cant think straight ever.When i was a little girl i wanted to become a doctor.Then in std 5 when kalpana chawla was all over the news i wanted to become an astronaut.When i was growing up my mum used to tell me a lot of things about my grandfather who was a lawyer.He was a man of principles always in a pensive mood immersed in deep thoughts sitting in his chamber.I wrote my first ever letter to him at that time i wanted to become a lawyer just like him.later on in class 9th my best friend used to draw little sketches of dresses.She wanted to become a fashion designer and i got fascinated by it too eventhough i am terrible at drawing.later on barkha dutt inspired me.I wanted to become a reporter.I wanted to report news from places of war.I wanted to reach out to people make their voices heard.By the time i finished my 10th.I had completely run out of options.I could have taken arts but then i felt the only subject that i could take up in arts was english there was no way i could study any other subjects in arts.I hated maths the most untill std 9th.I got an amazing maths tution sir who actually helped me improve my maths so much so that i got 97(cud have scored 100 had it not been for my calculation mistake) in maths in my 10th board and my parent couldnt believe it especially my mum.She still kept on advising me to take up arts may be because i am the least intelligent child in my family.So just to prove her wrong i took up science.Those last two years of 11th and 12th in my school were the darkest years of my life i went into a cocoon,depressed all the time.In 12th i immersed myself completely in books in preparation for the 12th board.By that time i had stopped thinking about what to do with my life.I had two options either engg or medical.So i decided to do engg but never prepared for the entrance.As a consequence of which i landed up at trident academy of technology,my alma mater.I was never serious about my studies during these four years except for the 2nd sem after which my grades either went down or remained constant.During the final year i knew i had to do mba and not just any stereotype mba in finance but mba in advertising management or marketing(ads fascinated me a lot)I did not want a career in the software field.So i enrolled myself at IMS but never studied seriously,never gave my best shot.I spent thousands of money on various exam forms(oh god why do they have to charge so much for those bloody forms,screw the system!!!).kept on appearing the exams ,kept on failing...
Then came the final frontier the campus recruitment season during the last sem of engg.I appeared a string of off campuses got rejected in all of them mostly because of my zilch technical knowledge,partly because i was reluctant to join an IT company.
Then i realised after four years of btech i will have to prove somthing to my parents so i studied a little bit boosted my self esteem and appeared for the first on campus in our college.Thank god i had a rehearsed answer for the basic question in any interview which is tell me something about yourself (imagine getting tongue tied at that but then we were taught a certain pattern to answer this question so thankfully i could answer that easily ).But to my horror i forgot the names of the subjects i had in the previous sem.(blame it on my poor memory or the boring subjects whatever..)Somehow mr oldie selected me and i went for the 2nd interview which was with a cute bengali HR.I started harping on how much i liked kolkatta because it still has this old world charm about it and how much i enjoyed the four years of my life there and he seemed pretty amused(i knew i had hit the bull's eye)Then he started the round of technical questions and immediately knew that i dont know a thing(damn!!).Still he asked me to tell me the fav topics of my fav sub(ya he was a kind soul).So i told him the few chapters of the only subject that i had studied and i could convince him with my answers.Finally i got selected.(phew!!).
While basking in this glory i forgot to study for my final sems and it is scaring the hell out of me to even think about the results.I just hope i pass in all the subjects.
All said and done now when engg is over and i have a job i am still clueless.Writing is what is keeping me alive and kicking these days and i want to become an author and publish my own book..
So this has been my clueless journey so far and i am completely clueless about what awaits me next.......maybe thats the beauty of life unfolding the future and venturing into the unknown....

HOW FAR CAN ONE GO???

Saw this movie unthinkable and it shook me up to such an extent that i could not stop myself from blogging about it.Released in nov 2009 starring Samuel L. Jackson,Michael Sheen and Carrie-Anne Moss.This film
is about an american muslim man yusuf who claims to have nuclear bombs planted in 3 U.S. cities.He gets
himself arrested deliberately and what follows is the tortorous interrogation by Henry Harold Humphries aka 'H',(samuel).Also involved is Special Agent Helen Brody of the FBI who initially strongly disapproves of the
methods 'H' uses. At the same time, Broody's team tries to determine the locations of the bombs using other
information.H resorts to completely gross and inhumane methods to make yusuf speak.He straps him to
a chair and chops off his finger.This makes agent broody question his barbaric methods but he has the
approval of higher authority.Broody on the other hand tries to take yosuf into confidence by reminding him
how his wife and children would suffer because of his misdeeds.yusuf is adamant and says he is prepared
and would do anything in the name of jihad.On further torture yosuf misleads broody which leads to detonation of a bomb at a shopping mall killing 53 people.Agent Brody, angry with the incident, takes a knife
and cuts Yusuf's chest. He is disgusted by this act and starts crying over Agent Broody that why she cares of
those 53 people and doesn't care of those 53 that Americans kill in Iraq everyday.Now H brings in yusuf's wife and makes her question him.Still incapable of getting any information from yusuf, H slashes yusuf's wife's throat in front of yusuf.Even now yusuf is not willing to cooperate so H does the unthinkable.He brings in yusuf's children but promises not to harm them.yusuf is made to believe otherwise so he gives up and gives the exact location of the bombs.This however does not stop H he advances to harm the children coz he believes there is a fourth bomb.Other officials stop him from doing so.Out of frustration H releases yusuf.yusuf then catches hold of a gun and shoots himself.The FBI agents then disarm the bombs but the camera then pans to reveal a fourth bomb in the same warehouse as it counts down to the time it is set to explode.This movie made me wonder at the intricacies of the human mind.I hated H when he tormented yusuf with his unthinkable tactics but then all of this seemed just and right when it is shown that yusuf is adamant and can kill in the name of allah.Jihad essentially means striving to live a moral and virtuous life and defending
Islam as well as fighting injustice and oppression.This does not entitle anyone to kill people in the name of jihad but this is what we see happening today.young minds are being indoctrinated with this concept leading to warfare.When agent broody tries to comfort yusuf with a soft voice and makes him understand that he is commiting a sin and not any kind of religeous duty it seems as if yusuf wud now speak instead he misleads her and then feels relieved on hearing that 53 people were killed as he believes he has sought revenge of the 53 islamic people that americans killed everyday.Now when H again resorts to the unthinkable and tortures yusuf's wife and children without even a hint of hesitation on his face i was shaken.how far can the interragators go in tormenting the accused(they are human beings afterall).Now when yusuf reveals the location and kills himself it made me think how far can the terrorists go killing innocent people,watching their wives and children getting tormented and then killing themselves.Atlast when the camera pans to show the fourth bomb all i could do was gape.I was dumbfounded at how cruel can a human being be.Eventhough it was just a film the current scenario is very much similar to the story.All these warfares in the name of religion and justice result in nothing but innumerable innocents being killed.It is said love alone rules everything then why this hatred.

We need to learn to love people and let peace prevail...